Happy Home.

We bought a house in a suburb that seemed pretty diverse. The last place we lived, was not so nice to people that had less money wise or that were brown. No this is not one of those “they Races cause we brown” moments. No, we would get funny looks and stairs going to the grocery store. I never felt that ever in my life. The new neighborhood grocery store no one cared about anything but buying their food. I never knew how that would matter.

I made the attempt to try to move forward from all the shit before. I never got the paternity test. Even though I thought about doing it on the low so I could just know. Because at this point I started thinking if the baby was her co-workers, she better off with me. He barely took care of the kids he had. I made sure my kids were always taken care of.

Ooh here it comes…

It was around New Years when it happened. My wife had what looked like some kind of cyst. It was getting bigger every day. So I took her to the emergency room. They looked at it for a second and knew it was Mersa. She was put in a privet room. The Doctors made me put on what felt like a hazmat suit. They would tell her that she was going to need medication injected every few hours. She was stairing blankly at the TV on above my head.

The Doctor asked me to set out in the hallway. The Doctor would tell me that she could die if the infection gets into the bloodstream. I could not believe what I was hearing. I felt the tears running down my face. Then I was asked if I had a plan if things turned south. “No.” Was what i could get out.

This was the second time my wife would be in a hospital and may be facing death. What was I going to do? We just bought the house. That familiar numb feeling was back. I did not miss it. I went back in the room. She had not moved. I asked if there was anything that I could do for her? All she said was “Bring me my phone charger cord.” I said ok.

Did you?

I forgot to bring it. The only thing on my mind was the baby. Was it my baby? I would end up getting her Grandmother to watch her. While this entire event was going on because it was too much for me to proessed. I still had my son with me. He and everyone else had no idea what was going threw my head when it came to the baby.

It was New Years. I invited a friend and his girl friend over. We would eat clams and drink 151 rum. The night ended with me throwing us and having my son clean me up. Before the ball even dropped. I slept on the bathroom floor because it was cold. I didn’t call my wife. She was left to spend the night alone.